As wives and moms, of course we want to be our best. But at times, it can be a struggle to just get through the day. In those seasons, trying to live up to a certain standard can leave us feeling less than. While Proverbs 31 is a beautiful portion of scripture, we have to be careful not to view it as a behavior checklist or kingdom requirement—and remember that the perfect wife and mom do not exist.
Doing and Being
Getting caught up in making sure that we’re doing all the right things can cause us to lose sight of what’s actually important—like spending time just sitting at Jesus’ feet.
We can become so consumed with performing and doing, that we don’t have the energy to rest and be.
Let’s look at the story of Mary and Martha. Martha is so busy doing productive things, she misses the experience of just being:
- in the presence of Jesus
- hearing the voice of Jesus
- learning from the wisdom of Jesus
Mary, however, recognizes the importance of replenishing our spirits at the feet of Christ.
Going back to Proverbs 31, it is incredibly important to be a good mom, wife, and homemaker. But, we must also take our spirits and motives into account—not just our acts.
Rather than focusing on the visible badge of our efforts, do we also:
- extend the grace and mercy we have been given?
- forgive?
- show love instead of judgement?
- lean more toward the Holy Spirit instead or self-reliance?
- produce life giving fruit?
The Lord Looks at Hearts
Because God looks deeper than our social media posts and how we behave in front of others, it’s more important to live from a pure heart than for the attention of the people around us.
Sadly, in our society, the appearance of having it all together sometimes becomes more important than what’s in our hearts. We can be so focused on making sure that we check all the boxes, our pride and behavior become our sources of validation. It can be a challenge to ensure that we are living in ways that glorify God instead of ourselves.
The Proverbs 31 woman is a breath of fresh air who doesn’t need to boast—because her actions speak for themselves. In fact, others praise her efforts.
My Take on Proverbs 31
What I love about the woman in Proverbs 31 is that she is the opposite of what is so typical in society and social media. Listed below is my take on what it means to be this type of woman. She:
- acts with strength and honor
- speaks with wisdom
- lets kindness guide her words
- focuses on the wellbeing of her household
- is motivated
- takes care of her body and health
- fears the LORD
- produces fruit
While we can’t live a checklist lifestyle, we can draw closer to God, sit at the feet of Jesus, and walk in the Spirit. And when we do, we can be the best version of ourselves and who God is calling us to be.